The explosion of the digital age has led to a modern behavioural epidemic: porn addiction.
Before the internet came along, enthusiasts had to visit their local news agency to browse for the latest issue of their favourite magazine. Or making a detour to adult shops in search for CDs or DVDs – all this restricted availability among much of the population.
Today, it is so widely accessible that the average age at which children first gain exposure to porn is 11 years old – at which point it has the potential of evolving into an obsessive interest.
Why people get addicted to porn in the first place
Humans are driven by their genetically hardwired need to have sex and pleasure – the overwhelming need to advance their genes. Porn taps into this desire in a way that the brain hasn’t adapted to resist effectively. The scarcity of not knowing when and if the dopamine rush will ever come back creates a supernormal stimulus. The person with an addiction stays on the lookout for more.
As a rule of thumb, any activity that can trigger dopamine can also strengthen the neural pathway.
Like other behavioural addictions, porn alters the brain’s reward circuits by creating alternative ‘neural pathways’ to seek reward. The more a person watches porn, the more the brain triggers dopamine – strengthening the neural pathway. This practice ultimately leads to addiction and the person seeks greater highs to trigger the release of more dopamine.
Addicts will often find themselves seeking shocking genres to boost their dopamine levels. When one kink fades, another, more shocking genre takes its place.
To explain things in an easier way. Let’s say overeating is your pathway. You know, downing a few dozen burgers is pleasurable and makes you happy. The more you eat, the more pronounced this neural pathway becomes. This pathway provides you with quick access to dopamine.
The mere act of fantasising about food will trigger dopamine pathways in the same way as actually eating food. The brain will seek to form even more neural pathways in its efforts to derive greater reward and pleasure.
Substitute overeating food for porn and you have a recipe for disaster. Because it doesn’t manifest physically in an addict, yet.
Most porn addicts can browse through hours upon hours of their favourite ‘tube’ websites, clicking through over 30 tabs of pornographic material with one hand, while masturbating with another. They never get to complete any of these videos, but rather, enjoy the prospect of seeing another video – because of the thrill of finding something new soars their dopamine levels.
The connection between porn and orgasm results in the release of dopamine – strengthening the neural pathway and making it more likely for the person to watch porn again.
An addiction to food or drugs has limits to addicts because of their toxic effects on the body’s organs such as the heart and liver. However, porn addiction does is not defined by those limits. A person can watch pornography for hours (and even days) on end to satiate their need for high dopamine levels.
At what point does porn become a problem?
Porn typically becomes a problem when it begins to interfere with a person’s emotions, intimacy, and sexual expectations. If you feel that porn has become a major problem for you, and you want to stop watching it but you can’t, you may be addicted to porn.
Below are just a few symptoms of porn that can manifest in multiple areas of one’s life:
Constantly Distracted
Porn addicts are easily distracted because their minds constantly drift to porn when they are at work, school, or with friends and family. It even seethes into their relationships, making them distant from their partner and any efforts at reconciliation. In worst-case scenarios, it could lead to a possible job loss, poor performance in exams, and behaviours that could lead to legal consequences.
Lack of Attraction
Porn addiction can result in unrealistic expectations of beauty in a partner. This may push the partner away as they feel hurt about their appearance and makes them question their self-esteem. In worst-case scenarios, the porn addict may not feel sexually interested at all unless they get to view more porn.
Edging and Staying Hard
Many porn addicts will try to maintain sexual arousal for several hours, in their search for the perfect video or image to ‘finish them off’. This is known as edging and affects one’s dopamine levels.
Porn-Induced Erectile Dysfunction
Excessive consumption of pornography can change a man’s appetite for sex, to the point that he no longer feels aroused by real-life sexual interactions. This is one of the worst-case scenarios as the man begins to experience erectile dysfunction. This is dangerous because the man may unknowingly decide to treat the condition through a pharmacological route – even though there may not be anything wrong with them physiologically.
Increased Financial Spending on Porn
Porn addicts begin to seek more extreme, ‘never-before-seen’ pictures and videos of their favorite genre. This usually involves spending their savings, salary, and even borrowing money to access porn. It is not unheard of for porn addicts to accrue a mountain of debt by excessively spending on porn beyond their means.
What is the best way to cope with porn addiction?
The road to recovery begins with admitting that there is a problem that needs to be dealt with.
Addiction to pornography is treatable. You don’t have to confront your addiction alone. Working with an expert sex therapist can help you create an effective roadmap to recovery. When it comes to Behavioural addictions, there is no such thing as a one-size-fits-all solution. Everyone will have their own journey and response.
Expert therapists can give you access to the most effective treatment methods such as cognitive Behavioural therapy to help you get a ‘handle’ on porn.
Finding out the “Why” and confronting shame
Behavioural addictions are a symptom of a wider problem. Addicts often watch inordinate amounts of porn to escape confronting their emotions or discomforting thoughts. It can be a coping strategy that may have been helpful at first, but over time can become even more harmful. Addicts may be using it to relieve stress, boredom, distraction, gain control, or simply escape from reality.
Finding out the reasons behind porn addiction is vital in devising the most effective treatment methods. A therapist helps you unravel the reasons that could be driving your porn addiction and address the underlying issue.
Finally, it is just as important to consider the feelings of shame and stigma that surround porn addiction. The emotional burden of pornography creates a vicious cycle that promotes addiction. It’s important to discuss your experience in a safe space, learning to forgive yourself, and minimising shame and guilt. Over time, therapy will weaken the grip porn has on you.
Reaching out for support with a professional sex therapist can be an empowering way to work through your addiction in a knowledgeable and supportive environment. All consultations with our experienced therapists are completely confidential and non-judgmental.
